Twentysomething

That word makes me cringe. Or even worse, quarterlife crisis. Are you kidding me? But at the same time, I feel like there's a little validity to the terms. I glimpsed at an article in the Flagpole today entitled "Twentysomething Can Be The Cruelest Season" and it made me laugh outloud and feel validated at the same time

I mean, think about it. No money. Lots of instability. No money. Only memories of college days. No money. Friendships that are far more "difficult" to maintain and enjoy than before. Did I mention no money?

I could go on, but I feel that you might get my point. It seems that the 20s are the practice room, the kitchen of life, if you will. There's a whole lot going on in these years that is just plain hard. Period. I'm being pushed in ways that aren't fun, and it feels like the dry/lonely/discouraging times far outweigh the fun, glorious days. But that's what happens in the kitchen -- the dirty work gets done here, the food gets prepared, the chefs slave away -- and the guests are oblivious to the toil.

The real deal (or so it seems) is the main course. The fruit of all the labor. And man is it good. At least in terms of food. And it's tempting for me to think of life that way as well.

'Get me outta here!!!!!' is what my mind is wanting me to believe. Give me a real job, or rather a man and a family, and some stability to count on, and a few core friends, and a lot of community to pour into and learn from. And just enough money to feel at ease, nothing more. You know what I mean? I live in my mind, in the 'whatifs' of the future, way too much.

Except the thing is, I don't think that life works like that. As much as I would like to think that this kitchen of life will lead to a fantastic meal of days beyond this twentysomething cycle, I just don't buy it. Life's not that simple. There is no culmination to this beautiful mess of life. That's just what it is, a mess. Money will always seem tight. Friends will always come and go. Stability, does that even exist? And as much as my heart longs for a man and a family, I know deep down that they will inevitably leave me wanting.

And so I'm back to my same song. I have no qualms with stating this over and over, as much for myself as for anyone reading this: God is my portion, and He's the only Thing in this mess that will meet my needs. Regardless of how messy my living space called life is.

So yeah, these years aren't the easiest. But I can't leave out some of the good I was reminded of today: the freedom of life that is just status quo as a student, the gift of knowledge and the ability to be stretched and challenged by learning everyday, the unique paths and people that I come in contact with daily, etc. etc. etc. There is a whole lot of blessing mixed into the strife.

Twentysomething? Yeah, I think it's bunk. What's next, Thirtysomething, Fortysomething, Seventysomething?? When does it stop? It doesn't.

Just live. Is it wrong to question your mess sometimes? Not at all. Is it bad to plan for the future? Never. But just remember to live. With intention. And praise God that He is your Portion, and that for some crazy reason, He is glorifying Himself through your messy, twentysomething (or thirtysomething, etc.) days.